New journey

So it has been a while since I blogged and a lot has happened in the past 5 months.  Erick received his transplant on January 14, 2015 and things are going great. He is all healed and will be returning to school in a couple of weeks. God is good!

But that is not what I to blog about....

Many of you have asked or questioned why I use essential oils on my children. Some of you may have seen the post about essential oils and seizures that went through Facebook a couple of months ago. Several of you shared that post with me. 

As many of you know Zachary our 7 year old has epilepsy. He was diagnosed in September 2014. I opted to put him on anti seizure medications because we were going into transplant with Erick and I needed to make sure his seizures were under control. It was a hard decision. Why? because I know what anti-seizure medication can do to a child. As I sit here today writing this I am in tears. My once sweet, rule following, compassionate, funny and loving child can not control his temper. He does not sleep well at night, he is irritable, irrational and fearful. My son who has never said a hurtful word to me and has always been respectful came at me today to hit me. 
What have I done? 

The only thing that has changed is I put him on medications. 
He currently is on Keppra, this is his second medication he has tried with the same results. 

The questions you should be asking me is why is he on Keppra?  Here is a list of side effects of Keppra
More common:

• Aggressive or angry
• anxiety
• change in personality
• chills
• cough or hoarseness
• crying
• depersonalization
• diarrhea
• dry mouth
• euphoria
• fever
• general feeling of discomfort or illness
• headache
• hyperventilation
• irregular heartbeats
• irritability
• joint pain
• loss of appetite
• lower back or side pain
• mental depression
• muscle aches and pains
• nausea
• painful or difficult urination
• paranoia
• quick to react or overreact emotionally
• rapidly changing moods
• restlessness
• shaking
• shivering
• shortness of breath
• sleepiness or unusual drowsiness
• sore throat
• stuffy or runny nose
• sweating
• trouble sleeping
• unusual tiredness or weakness
• vomiting

Less common

• Bloody nose
• burning, crawling, itching, numbness, prickling, "pins and needles", or tingling feelings
• clumsiness or unsteadiness
• discouragement
• dizziness or lightheadedness
• double vision
• earache
• feeling of constant movement of self or surroundings
• feeling sad or empty
• increase in body movements
• loss of bladder control
• loss of memory
• mood or mental changes
• outburst of anger
• pain or tenderness around the eyes and cheekbones
• problems with memory
• redness or swelling in the ear
• seizures
• sensation of spinning
• shakiness and unsteady walk
• shakiness in the legs, arms, hands, or feet
• tightness of the chest
• tiredness
• trembling or shaking of the hands or feet
• trouble concentrating
• unsteadiness, trembling, or other problems with muscle control or coordination

I have italicized the ones that Zachary is currently experiencing. 

Side effects of essential oils? Some of the oils may trigger seizures in patients that are already prone to seizures. So what do we do about that? We avoid them, that simple!



I can tell you what I am doing now....looking for alternatives. And yes essential oils are a part of his daily routine and well as mine.  
In addition we are looking at diet and other more natural ways to control his seizures so that he can have his childhood back.  

So when you ask me why I use oils this is my response is this, in our family we have seen amazing results with using essential oils. We sleep better, our immune systems are stronger, my hormones are more balanced. Are oil the end all cure all? No we have also changed our diet and taken chemicals in our home. 

And lots of prayer because the same statement I made above about Erick is true in Zachary's situation too. God is GOOD! 

New Year!

I wish I knew how to feel about a new year. Quite honestly I never understood why we spend a full year doing things we need to change and then at the first of the year vow to change them. Why wait? I have been guilty of doing it until one year I decided not to do resolutions.
I am so thankful God is not like me. Next year I will lose weight, next year I will be a better wife, next year I will play with my kids more, next  year I will volunteer more, next year............

If anything about my journey through life has taught me is that we only have today, right now. We never know what tomorrow or the next hour will bring really. After the accident the railroad had to do a reenactment of the accident. One of the things that really struck me from that is the entire accident took 3 seconds to happen. 3 SECONDS!!! That is approximately how long it takes you to take one breath. In one breath my life was changed forever.

It has been 12 years since that fateful day and I admit I am human I lose focus of that and get busy and am short with my children and my husband, I want to rich through the days like everyone else....next year....we can always get to it next year right?

But what is next year does not ring in the way you want it to or think it will? Does that change who God is to  you?

This year we are facing a big surgery. I have had to stop and ask myself the question of what if you lose another child, does that change who God is to you? What if that child is not the one facing the lung transplant, what if it is your husband or worse your whole family again?  Those are scary questions for me but my answer is a resounding NO it does not change who God is to me.

And I admit I have wavered on this question for the past month. But I want to share a little story with you that helped me refocus and get my feet back under me.

When I left my children with my father in November 2002 to go visit my grandfather in Massachusetts it was suppose to snow while I was there. Joshua asked me to build him a snowman and take a picture of it. And so I did not knowing that he would never see that picture.  Once we came back home to Texas and buried my children and my father, my mother and I decided we could not stay here for Christmas and decided to go back to Massachusetts to spend time with my grandfather and the rest of our family. While we were there I was doing some Christmas shopping for my nephews and they wanted a football. I could not find a football anywhere. Then I drove by this small store and they had a basket full of balls and one football in that basket. I promptly stopped and bought the football. As I was walking out of the store the store owner said to wait he had something for me. He then proceeded to hand me a snowman. I did not know this man but that snowman gave me such comfort in one of the darkest times of my life. God used that man to let me know he had me in the palm of his hand.
This year as I was going through the holidays and asking myself those questions and really struggling with what we were facing and what we have faced this past year I went to a Christmas party with some wonderful women I have the honor of serving with. I almost did not go because I was not in the mood to celebrate but I went and guess what my sweet friend gave me for Christmas......yup a snowman. Nope she did not know the story or that I was struggling but God used her  and her gift to remind me that he has not changed. He is still the same God that walked me through the death of my children and the same God that called me to be a mom to the amazing children he blessed me with.
Some would argue that it is just a snowman but with God it is never JUST a snowman!

"What if some did not have faith? Will their lack of faith nullify God's faithfulness?  Not at all! Let God be true, and every man a liar. As it is written: "So that you may be proved right when you speak and prevail when you judge." Romans 3:1-4