Confession time..........I was watching Oprah today and it spurred this blog.
She mad multiple families on her show that have served or are serving in the military. She also had families that have paid the ultimate sacrifice as they lost a loved one in the war. Her purpose of the show was to help us know what to do for these families. We all have been in a situation where we are not sure of what to say or do so many times we do nothing.....
That is not the answer. So here are some thoughts I wanted to share from my own experience:
1. Do not ask "how are you" unless you really want to know
2. Do not say "call me if you need anything". This will not happen the person that is dealing with trauma or separation is so wrapped up in doing the "next" thing that they cannot even see what they need.
3. DO show up..............to either bring a meal, mow the grass, clean the house, or just sit and listen.
4. Do call, send an email, or a note of encouragement
We use to as a society take care of each other. We use to know our neighbors and we use to live by our families. Be sensitive to the needs of those around you. Reach out and let them know you care. You may not think it makes a difference or that someone else is taking care of them. You may never know the impact you have on that person but believe me it makes a difference. So does your silence and lack of action.
Grays 2013
sometimes words aren't even necessary. a hug, i'm sorry, or shared tears can be enough. just let me see that you still remember, that you care.
ReplyDeletei try to keep that in mind as well!